


A Painful Need

by MistyBeethoven



Series: "Yes, I Really Am This Pathetic!" or "How to Say I Love You With a Story" [8]
Category: John Wick (Movies)
Genre: Acceptance, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Attics, BBW, Chubby Girl, Demisexuality, Doggy Style, Erotica, F/M, Fat Shaming, For Adults Only, Hand Jobs, Inspired by Lady and the Tramp (1955), Kissing, Loss of Virginity, Love Confessions, Masturbation, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Missionary Position, Omega Verse, Oral Sex, Overweight, Penis In Vagina Sex, Rimming, Romance, Rutting, Scenting, Shyness, Size Difference, Swans, Ugly Duckling, Virginity, plus size OFC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-06
Updated: 2019-12-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 00:28:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21688381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistyBeethoven/pseuds/MistyBeethoven
Summary: You are a seventeen year old girl; sent years before to the Tarkovsky Theatre, you must work there as a stagehand and not a ballerina due to your weight problem. While your peers find their amusement in taunting you, one student, the morose young Alpha Jardani Jovonovich, refuses to join them.Going into heat, you hide to escape notice, assault and even more ridicule only to be discovered by the young assassin-to-be. To your joy, you discover that his brooding nature harbours hidden longings and that he is more than willing to help you with your shared painful need.
Relationships: Jardani Jovonovich/You, John Wick/You
Series: "Yes, I Really Am This Pathetic!" or "How to Say I Love You With a Story" [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1589944
Comments: 2
Kudos: 130





	A Painful Need

**Author's Note:**

> This is what happens when I watch "Lady and the Tramp" and start to think about Tramp and Lady and what it would be like when Lady went into heat and Tramp took care of her need. Same thing happens when I think about Elsa in "Born Free." (I find this sort of thing all kind of sexy although it's filtered through the sweet aesthetic my brain usually has.)
> 
> Of course, I set it all in the Omegaverse where heats are natural.
> 
> And of course, it's all over romanticized because in reality it's usually not that sweet or romantic. And I'm sure any guy would remind me of this fact...or by seeing two dogs going at it like in "The Bad Batch."
> 
> But I'm demisexual, myself, and wish that it was sweet like this (although with just the right amount of dirty to make it interesting.)
> 
> And, yes, I know that I'm rambling so I'll just shut up and let you read the story if you still want to. :D <3

At the Tarkovsky Theatre you often find yourself watching the rehearsals for the latest planned ballet with both joy and sadness.

You wonder how you ever managed to end up at the Tarkovsky Theatre as you stare at the dancers on the large wooden stage and find yourself inevitably comparing yourself with them. The girls here are blessed with slender sensual bodies, beautiful faces and eloquent elegance; they are like the swans come to life in the famous ballet that the company has performed so often in the past. You can easily imagine them being some perfect animal given human form (perhaps only to haunt you that you are not) and not encumbered by the common restraints of less graceful creatures.

You know that you are one of these not so blessed beasts.

Looking down at your legs, so much thicker than theirs, and your belly so much rounder and protruding you know that you are not a swan but still only an ugly duckling. When you look into the reflection of the water, cygnus will never stare back. Still often you tell yourself that this is okay. You try to be kind, at least, and in the cruel world that may be more rare, precious and treasured than beauty in the end.

The girls and boys under the Director's tutelage seem not to have acquired this one specific trait. Kindness was left out of their make as softness was left out of stone. When they don't ignore you, they treat you like dirt and you cannot decide which is better: to be left feeling invisible and wondering why you aren't seen or to feel horrible but have your existence confirmed.

Once again, you comfort yourself that it is all right: They are not aware that their actions mark them, tainting them from the inside out as cruelty always does. Being accepted by people who are mean is not a compliment but a certain indictment in itself. It is better to be alone and in the moments when you can be _alone_ you somehow manage to rebuild the places they have dented and try to calm the screaming inside that tells you that you are not good enough and never will be.

If there is one source of light inside the Tarkovsky Theatre, where you have been chosen to be a stagehand instead of a dancer, it is a boy named Jardani Jovonovich. He is handsome; possibly the most handsome boy you have ever seen. His hair is the color of a swan colored ebony instead of ivory, his lips full, his torso strongly built and long backed while his legs are not thin but sturdy. You like his body for its strength. What you like about Jardani even more though is his quiet detatchment and his general kindness. He has never made fun of you throughout your shared time at the Tarkovsky Theatre.

When the other students have mocked you for your weight, Jardani has stepped in to defend you. You also can recall once after a ballerina called Nicolette called you an elephant, the boy dropped her during the practicing of a difficult routine. He had caught her every previous time but after she had almost brought you to tears, Jovonovich's hands had not been ready and the long limbed and petite girl had ended up on the hardwood planks instead.

"Sorry," her ballet partner had replied but you thought that there was a wicked glint in the young man's eyes; a thought further strengthened when he had turned to smile at you.

You love to see Jardani Jovonovich's smile. For while usually he seems so serious and sad, when he does allow a grin entrance to his face, it lights up and he appears young and unconcerned with the usual sorrows he encounters and faces in silence.

Jardani's fumble whilst catching Nicole did not lessen her lust for him however. All the Omegas in the Tarkovsky are drawn to the handsome Alpha. During each of their heats, it is not an uncommon sight to see them propositioning him at the chance that he will help them in their need. The boy never does, however; Jardani has never even been known to rut, and they each inevitably seek satisfaction with someone else instead.

You do not understand this. Although you have had several heats thus far, you cannot understand why the other girls are so quick to settle or have sex with anybody who is willing to. Sex to you as always centered on a man you are attached to and have built a fondness for inside of your heart. Sleeping with strangers or somebody you usually abhor just for your own pleasure or to fulfil a passing need seems wrong to you. You would much rather give someone you love pleasure and know that they care for you in return.

Right now, as you feel your own heat coming upon you, you wish that your mate would be Jardani Jovonovich even though this seems hopelessly foolish.

Although you are large, you know of several Alphas at the Tarkovsky whom would be willing to mate with you during your time. They have come sniffing around, the needs of their bodies outweighing what they would usually find themselves willing to do. After going to the Director out of fear after a near rape she gave you the medication required to prevent your cycle and save the others from the _embarrassment_ of assaulting you.

You remember this about the lecture that she gave you; and a lecture it had been instead of a talk to calm your frayed nerves. You were left wanting nothing more than to crawl somewhere dark and nest; to forget her insinuations that it had been all _your_ fault and not the boy's whom had meant to rape you.

He would have succeeded if it wasn't for Jardani.  
You can still remember him coming to your defense as you lay helpless backstage, whimpering as the Alpha was about to thrust his demanding organ inside your slick covered opening; an opening that was too lost to its own need that it was not listening to your heart and mind screaming for the boy to stop. Jardani had pulled your attacker off of you and proceeded to beat the other Tarkovsky student to, not only an inch of his life, but a centimeter.

Jovonovich had stood there afterwards, looking down at the bloody form of his peer, his clenched fists covered in blood, as you lay with your tummy smooshed against the floor, admiring his wide back and feeling dirty because of this. When he turned and looked down at you from over his beautiful shoulder you felt a fresh spurt of slick leak out and you thought you saw Jardani's nostrils flare as he picked up the scent.

While you were still lying there, tears drying on your cheeks, and your large pale ass exposed from where the other Alpha had torn off both pairs of your pants (outer and under,) you watched as the boy you loved, started to sniff the air and turn towards you. He looked like a wolf then, his actions sleek and dangerous. You let off a small mewl as his head was nearing your buttocks, his tongue appearing past his sensuous lips when the Director had appeared and sent Jardani away and skirted you away to her office to clean up and receive a tongue lashing.

You would much rather have received one in a different way from Jardani Jovonovich.

Since then you are on your pills and when they do not work, as is sometimes the case, you find someplace dark to hide until your heat is over. They notice your absence as much as they normally do your presence so you never need to worry about vanishing or reappearing.

As you writhe in your secret and shadowed nest, feeling the slick staining the sheets you have brought with you, you picture Jardani Jovonovich standing there in his tights, his erection large and dripping with the precum that is already staining those same tights, his fists covered in blood from having protected you and he's looking at you in that dangerous way that makes you feel hot between your legs, like he could either save or destroy you. Your hand goes to the area you feel growing needful and you touch yourself thinking about the boy with the strange dark eyes as you make yourself come over and over again.

This time you know that you will find yourself retreating to your dark corner in the Tarkovsky again, pleasing yourself to thoughts of Jardani until your heat has passed again: the pills have not worked and your heat is almost upon you.

Silently you go to the attic of the theatre and make for yourself a small nest in the corner. You do not feel completely safe or sound, not having a mate to defend you or answer that painful need and cry at your furiously dripping core but this is all right too and hopefully will pass soon enough.

You're playing with yourself again to thoughts of Jardani when you hear the door to the attic open and the boy, himself, suddenly appears. You have not seen him for a while; he has excused himself from rehearsals due to a claim of sickness. Jovononvich being ill is a rare occurrence and it has opened himself up to much gossip behind his back although you do not listen to it. Gossip is not nice. The pain of your pre-heat, plus your existing shyness, had made you in too much pain to seek Jardani out to try to help him. All that you found the strength to do was leave him cookies and other sweet treats to try to cheer him up with whatever he had been going through.

You don't have time to hide now, and your heart almost leaps up your throat and out of your mouth as he spots you lying on the ground in the nest you hastily constructed; your hand is covered in your own slick from having been touching yourself as you thought of him. Although you hastily try to wipe it off, it is too late; he has seen it.

He also still smells it coming off of you, his nostrils flaring in clear recognition of the scent.

"Jardani..." you whisper, wanting to urge him to go but finding yourself aroused by the way that he is looking at you.

He gets on his knees before you, taking your sweating head in his large hands and wiping away a stray and wet strand of hair which has fallen across your face.

"Are _you_ the reason?" he asks softly, bringing his face closer to yours as he searches it with the same dark and thoughtful eyes that you have come to love.

"The reason for?" you ask, embarrassed at the slightly intimate promise of the question, his nearness as he asks it and the fresh spurt of slick coming from you at your ensuing arousal.

Your shyness does not improve when he softly takes your hand, which had been wet, and brings it to the front of his tights. You feel his cock, which is swollen and hard and partially hidden by the jacket he has tied there: showing the answer instead of telling it. You gasp as you feel the erection and your cunt twitches, blood flowing to it as you feel its hollowness want to take Jardani's length inside and be made whole. You moan as you feel the Alpha's member give a few of its own spasms at your touch.  
"I...I caused that?" you ask shocked that you could make the beautiful assassin in training turned on so terribly much.

"I had to tell the Director that I could not perform this week," Jovonovich whispers into your ear. "And it is all _your_ fault."

He gives your ear a playful bite and you suddenly realize the true reason that Jardani has been absent from practice. You experience a glowing surge of happiness that it was due to you: your heat was making him rut.

"Why?" you ask. Jardani Jovonovich rarely ruts. Now searching your memory you can link each of his ruttings to your own cycle and this further confuses you. "I am not like the others..." you say ashamed at your difference.

"That is why, I love you," he says once more bringing your face to his. Your foreheads now touch as the sweat on them both mixes. "You aren't like the others here...you are kind and you still use your heart and your brain...I can only rut with the person I love."

At this confession of your feelings being reciprocated, you close the distance between you and kiss him clumsily but passionately. As you do, you feel his cock twitching in your hand and becoming even more wet; his precum leaking through the clothing in its fresh gush. Propping yourself up, your hands fumble with the boy's belt as your kiss deepens. You pull down Jardani's pants until you are staring at his huge and leaking cock very close to your face. It is red and glistening from the amount of fluid that is leaking out. You start to touch it with unsure hands, liking the feel of the wet organ and the balls underneath. You play with them all for a while to Jardani's enjoyment until you've grown tired of only using your hands and bring your mouth to the furiously leaking penis.

"You don't have to do this," he moans," but the cock sets out another little torrent of its offering and you know that it is wanting and needing you to.

"I...I want to," you say. "I'm just not too sure if I'll be any good. You see, I never..."

"You're a virgin?"

You nod your head, timidly. The other girls seem so proud about the many partners that they have had. You have never been ashamed not to have given yourself to somebody you don't love. Still now you are afraid you will disappoint him with your inexperience. This doesn't seem to worry Jardani as he tries to hug you with boyish enthusiasm, only to crash your head accidentally into his erection.

"Sorry," he apologetically murmers.

"It's okay," you say, hugging his legs again before backing away a little.

Jardani Jovonovich holds your head again and strokes your hair lovingly as you bring your lips to his penis and start to suckle its enflamed head. You let your tongue loll around the corneum, tasting him. While it is nothing you are quite used to, you do not mind it and enjoy the way that he is reacting to it even more. From his heavy breathing and more precum coming gushing out you know that you mustn't be sucking too badly at it.

Apparently all those years of eating ice cream cones and lollipops were worth something more than just adding to your waistline.

He's ruffling your hair enthusiastically as you take more of him inside of your moist mouth, rubbing your tongue on the underside of his member. You feel his fluid trickle down your throat and suck a little bit harder until he backs away.

"Am I doing something wrong?" you ask frightened as your eyes, wide and imploring, stare up into his.

"No," he says wiping a bit of precum from off the corner of your mouth. "You're doing it too right; I don't want to lock inside your throat."

Having forgotten that this was even a possibility you are grateful for his concern and restraint. Still seeing his demanding member you want to grant its need to lock. You start to undress, hesitantly, aware of your fleshy figure. Jardani quickly removes the rest of his own clothing and rushes to help you with yours. Sensing your embarrassment at your weight, he smiles tenderly and begins to rub his wrist all over your body. You are about to ask him what he is doing before you realize that he is scenting you. In order to make you know that he loves you, all of you, he is marking every exposed inch of you as his own. You giggle at first from being ticklish and he seizes on this even more, enjoying making you laugh as opposed to your former sorrow.

Now naked, something, the Alpha seems to have no problem with, you get on all fours and offer yourself to the man you love. You gasp at first as you feel his tongue enter your vagina, licking up the slick oozing out but then you find yourself crying out in pleasure as he insists on lapping up as much of the liquid as he can. When his tongue goes from your vagina to your anus you squeal a bit, knowing that he is trying to catch the slick which has fallen there also.

Although you would not have previously admitted it, you wanted this done and enjoy the feeling of it. Jardani finishes up by trailing his tongue from the start of your crack to the perineum and then back several times and you feel yourself coming, your ass trembling against his face as you climax.

You're panting and seeming very much like a dog on all fours when you feel Jovonovich's hands on each of your ass cheeks and his penis preparing for entrance. Even though you have just come, you desire this part of him inside of you: your heat still desiring the spilling of his seed.

"Are you sure?" he asks.

"Oh yes," you reply. "Yes!"

With a rub of the back of your neck, he thrusts inside and you cry out again in a divine mixture of pain and pleasure. You feel your flesh break but it is welcome for Jardani Jovonovich has been the one to take it.

Slowly he starts to thrust, and while it takes a moment to get used to, you soon bask in the feeling of him wide and deep inside of you. When he finally locks, you feel a wave of serenity at odds with the lustful passion claiming you. It perfectly makes sense however: you are making love for the first time and it is with somebody that you love and who loves you back. You can tell further that he does because he is feeling your tummy again.

"Jardani," you moan after some more caresses from his searching fingers and thrusting of his groin. You feel the pressure building in your own private place until it finally peaks again, a violent sensation of spasms, starting from your clit going to your cunt and then to your anus.

Feeling you clenching around his penis, Jardani moans out your name as he ejaculates and you whimper in ecstasy as you feel his seed filling you. You're both panting as he unlocks and pulls out, his come leaking from your hole and dribbling on to your full thighs. He falls down next to you on the now dirty sheet and takes you in his strong arms.

"I'm squishy," you say, dazed but in the best way.

"Yes," the spent man says, nuzzling next to your neck. "And cuddly."

Your arms going around him, you feel his ass, tentatively. He returns the motion and your hands rise to feel the back you once admired after he had saved your virginity which he has now taken. You fall asleep like that, resting your head against his chest.

When you wake up it is later and you can tell from the darkness outside the window and in the attic that it is night time. You feel the need seizing you again as slick has replaced Jardani Jovonovich's semen on your thighs.

"Unhhhh...Jardani," you whimper again and he is awake instantly.

He hovers over you and you feel his cock, once more rock hard, pressing into your large belly. His lips are on your nipples, sucking them and making the pressure between your legs increase until you are squirming underneath him. In response to your writhing you feel his dick painting your belly with his precum. When he removes his mouth from your breast it is to ask, "Can I take care of you?"

"Yes," you reply in a vulnerable whisper. "Can I take care of you too?"

"Yes," he says touched as he lovingly spreads your legs (so unlike the other girls are but it doesn't matter anymore because Jardani doesn't care) and pushes inside once more.

He easily knows how to please you and you know how to please him too as you feel him locking inside again and you offer him a small sweet smile; one you see him return in the moonlight before kissing your stomach.

As you make love with Jardani Jovonovich, the man once again joyfully attending to your heat, you feel warmed and blessed knowing that he is not taking down the easiest prey. For he has had the most beautiful of the women and men here approach him but he has chosen you. He is taking you now because you simply are the one that he _desires_ and _loves_ the most. There is no hidden motivation nor is there anything for you to fear.

And as you realize this you bask in the knowledge that you are helping Jardani Jovonovich in equal measure:

You are easing his own painful need just as he is freeing you from yours.

When you are finished again, biding your time patiently until the next bout of need comes again, Jardani hold you and looks into your eyes.

"My swan," he calls you.

"I'm too big," you protest.

"Have you ever seen a swan?" he asks with a laugh. "They are big bodied _and_ still beautiful."

You stop and consider this; he is right, of course. Before Jardani kisses you hungrily and with much passion, you look into your reflection in his eyes and no more see an ugly duckling staring back at you; you see what Jardani Jovonovich has seen this whole time: Cygnus in human form.

You kiss each other with much love before you lie down again in one another's embrace, searching for a shared and peaceful slumber until the painful need comes upon you both once more.


End file.
